It's Christmas Bitches! I Got Ho Ho Ho's In Different Area Codes!

I think this whole rap lingo is fucken hilarious.

Anyhow, it be Christmass and I just wanted to send a shout out to all my peeps around the country.

Rimmy, Du-Pac, Jovknee, Kibilz, Pure and Simple, Ark, squirrel, Gravedigger, Indi, Randy, Haley, Dale, Brock, Dave and Vanessa.....And if I forgot anyone well boo fucking hoo.

Any how, even though some of us aren't having such a good time as others for certain reasons, My best witches...er...Wishes go out to everyone.......No I'm not an Arcane Pimp, so SHUT IT!




I'm Out.

Solid!

What I always wanted to do, but in the Denny's/Perkins here in Kelowna

When I go insane......notice I didn't say if, I said when......

I'm going to return home and call everyone I know to the coffee shop here....and I'll let Nick Cave here tell you the rest......


I am tall and I am thin
Of an enviable hight
And I've been known to be quite handsome
In a certain angle and in certain light

Well I entered into O'Malley's
Said, "O'Malley I have a thirst
"O'Malley merely smiled at meSaid
"You wouldn't be the first"

I knocked on the bar and pointed
To a bottle on the shelf
And as O'Malley poured me out a drink
I sniffed and crossed myself

My hand decided that the time was nigh
And for a moment it slipped from view
And when it returned, it fairly burned
With confidence anew

Well the thunder from my steely fist
Made all the glasses jangle
When I shot him, I was so handsome
It was the light, it was the angle

"Neighbours!" I cried, "Friends!" I screamed
I banged my fist upon the bar"
I bear no grudge against you!"
And my dick felt long and hard

"I am the man for which no God waits
But for which the whole world yearns
I'm marked by darkness and by blood
And one thousand powder-burns"

Well, you know those fish with the swollen lips
That clean the ocean floor
When I looked at poor O'Malley's wife
That's exactly what I saw

I jammed the barrel under her chin
And her face looked raw and vicious
Her head it landed in the sink
With all the dirty dishes

Her little daughter Siobhan
Pulled beers from dusk till down
And amongst the townfolk she was a bit of a joke
But she pulled the best beer in town

I swooped magnificent upon he
rAs she sat shivering in her grief
Like the Madonna painted on the church-house wall
In whale's blood and banana leaf

Her throat it crumbled in my fist
And I spun heroically around
To see Caffrey rising from his seat
I shot that mother fucker down

"I have no free will", I sang
As I flew about the murder
Mrs. Richard Holmes, she screamed
You really should have heard her

I sang and I laughed, I howled and I wept
I panted like a pup
I blew a hole in Mrs. Richard Holmes
And her husband stupidly stood up

As he screamed, "You are an evil man"
And I paused a while to wonder
"If I have no free will then how can I
Be morally culpable, I wonder"

I shot Richard Holmes in the stomach
And gingerly he sat down
And he whispered weirdly, "No offense"
And then lay upon the ground

"None taken", I replied to him
To which he gave a little cough
With blazing wings I neatly aimed
And blew his head completely off

I've lived in this town for thirty years
And to no-one I am a stranger
And I put new bullets in my gun
Chamber upon chamber

And I turned my gun on the bird-like Mr. Brookes
I thought of Saint Francis and his sparrows
And as I shot down the youthful Richardson
It was St. Sebastian I thought of, and his arrows

I said, "I want to introduce myself
And I am glad that all you came"
And I leapt upon the bar
And shouted out my name

Well Jerry Bellows, he hugged his stool
Closed his eyes and shrugged and laughed
And with an ashtray as big as a fucking really big brick
I split his head in half

His blood spilled across the bar
Like a steaming scarlet brook
And I knelt at it's edge on the counter
Wiped the tears away and looked

Well, the light in there was blinding
Full of God and ghosts of truth
I smiled at Henry Davenport
Who made an attempt to move

Well, from the position I was standing
The strangest thing I ever saw
The bullet entered through the top of his chest
And blew his bowels out on the floor

Well I floated down the counter
Showing no remorse
I shot a hole in Kathleen Carpenter
Recently divorced

But remorse i felt and remorse I had
It clung to every thing
From the raven's hair upon my head
To the feathers on my wings

Remorse sqeezed my hand in it's fradulent claw
With it's golden hairless chest
And I glided through the bodies
And killed the fat man Vincent West

Who sat quietly in his chair
A man become a child
And I raised the gun up to his head
Executioner-style

He made no attempt to resis
tSo fat and dull and lazy
"Did you know I lived in your street?" I said
And he looked at me as though I were crazy

"O", he said, "I had no idea"
And he grew as quiet as a mouse
And the roar of the pistol when it went off
Near blew that hat right off the house

Well, I caught my eye in the mirror
And gave it a long and loving inspection
"There stands some kind of man", I roared
And there did, in the reflection

My hair combed back like a raven's wing
My muscles hard and tight
And curling from the business end of my gun
Was a query-mark of cordite

Well I spun to the left, I spun to the right
And I spun to the left again
"Fear me! Fear me! Fear me!"
But no one did cause they were dead

And then there were the police sirens wailing
And a bull-horn squelched and blared
"Drop your weapons and come out
With your hands held in the air"

Well, I checked the chamber of my gun
Saw I had one final bullet left
My hand, it looked almost human
As I raised it to my head

"Drop your weapon and come out!
Keep your hands above your head!"
I had one one long hard think about dyin
And did exactly what they said

There must have been fifty cops out there
In a circle around O'Malley's bar
"Don't shoot", I cried, "I'm a man unarmed!"
So they put me in their car

And they sped me away from that terrible scene
And I glanced out of the window
Saw O'Malley's bar, saw the cops and the cars
And I started counting on my fingers......

one......two.......three...........

Nick Cave & The Bad Seeds--O'Mally's Bar


See you all in a few years :D

Power the World......WITH KITTENS!

I got into Kelowna B.C. about 2 days ago now.

The trip didn't seem as long as I remember....But it was long I assure you. I don't want to complain though, cause I'm here and I've know people that have made way longer trips.
So I get home and my mom has this kitten, about 6 months old called Midnight.

This cat is the ultimate in kitty sweetness. I'm telling you! This cat could give diabetes to a hummingbird it's so sweet. Super super cuddly, and entertaining as hell to play with, so entertaining in fact, that she gave me an Idea.

You could just sack all nuclear power now and set up kitten generators.

Because, this kitten along with many of her brethren, has soooo much energy it isn't even funny, except that it is, especially when you get out the laser pointer.

Wind and kittens man, the renewable sources of power for the future!

Just get a bunch of people to play with kittens all day and I kid you not, by the end of an hour you'll have enough moxy to power a house for a week. Also if they find a way to harness cuteness as a power source, damn then we're all set!

Well that's about all I have for you this morning, except this...

You know what's funnier than seeing an East Indian with an Afro?

You'll have to tell me because to date, I haven't been able to find anything.

I Caved.....

Ok so, here IS another one, but it's from someone cool, so it's ok

Pick ONE from each pair that you think describes me the best & leave it in the comments. Then copy this and post it in your own journal to see how your friends view you.

* dominant or submissive*
logical or intuitive*
social or loner*
kinky or vanilla*
cute or sophisticated*
kitten or puppy*
warm flannel sheets or sleek satin*
leader or follower*
quiet or talkative*
spontaneous or planned*
teddy bear or porcelain doll*
hiking or window shopping*
tequila or vodka*
top or bottom*
barefoot or shoes*
jeans or slacks*
tender or rough*
aware or dreamy*
nerd or geek

I Have Absolutely NO Problem With Christianity, It's Those Bloody Christians That Make The Religion So Fucking Unbearable!

..Ok right! So you've got your tongue down her throat and her legs are up on the mantle piece.....

Sorry......Wrong window......

Greetings all.

Well tomorrow I head back west to see my family and friends. It should be a total blast. I hope I don't die on the plane ride. At least being of Norse decent I know where I'm going...Want a preview? Click HERE!

Seeing that I'm comfy for whatever awaits me.

I'm homeless as of the 28th of Febuary, unless I thought I was.

I am moving in with a couple of friends, which is good cause it will give me a lot of extra cash, as living alone is great it is also expensive. This new year seems like a good one, I've got my eye on the finger and my balls crossed...........or.....Something along those lines. ;)

Anyhow, not much else to say right now, so I'll talk to you all when I'm in B.C.!!

oh yes, I guess it's time for me to post one of these stupid things, it will be the first, last and only. So pay attention!


What's going on in your life?> >> >> >
1. What is your occupation? If the world was a boar, I'd be the head Tit...That give you a clue?
2. What color are your underwear? Thermal
3. What are you listening to right now? A Song Called "In Love With The Night" by Funker Vogt
4. What was the last thing you ate? Microwavable bowl of Tariaki Steak and Noodles
5. Do you wish on stars? If I was on Angolina Jolie, I would wish I could last longer
6. If you were a crayon, what color would you be? A Broken Blue one that is half eaten by a 4 year old
7. How is the weather right now? Snowing and blowing like a whore in dept
8. Last person you spoke to on the phone? My Fiance
9. Do you like the person who sent this to you? Why not, It's Christmas
10. How old are you today? 27
11. Favorite 'alcohol'? Anything that stays down, or, Guinness, or Irish Whiskey, or Rye, or Scotch
12. Favorite sport to watch? The Kitty 500 (Cats tearing around the house for no real reason at all)
13. Have you ever dyed your hair? Yes, Purple once and now its BLACK BLACK BLACK BLACK #1
14. Do you wear contacts or glasses? Neither help, but I have cosmetic ones that make my Irises white
15. Pets? One Cat, and one creature I feed kids to under the stairs
16. Favorite food? Babies, a la Mode
17. What was the last movie you watched? Your Mom was in it, and she was doing something obscene on a jungle gym with a jack hammer...
18. Favorite day of the year? Halloween
19. What do you do to vent anger? Push old ladies into oncoming Jehova's Witnesses
20. Fall or Spring? Fall Bitches!
21. Hugs or kisses? I tend to jump straight to the clitoris
22. Cherry or Blueberry? Both are pretty good
23. Do you want your friends to email you back? If they like
24. Who is most likely to respond? Don't know, if it's on me blog, could be anyone.
25. Who is least likely to respond? Maggie Thatcher
26. Who do you live with? I Live alone, but not for long....
27. When was the last time you cried? A while ago.....
28. What is on the floor of your closet? Box of recording stuff
29. Who is the friend you have had the longest? I would Have to say my friend Chad, I've known him 17 years
30. What did you do last night? Sleep...Too much
31. Favorite smell? Woman, not perfume although some of those smell nice too, but I mean real woman smell, it relates to the fact that women don't sweat, the glisten.
32. What inspires you? ROCK'N ROLL
33. What are you afraid of? Zombies.....And flying stinging insects.....
34. Plain, cheese or spicy hamburger? Sounds good to me...
35. Favorite car? Any Wrapped around a telephone pole with a dead drunk driver inside.
36. Favorite dog breed? Werewolf
37. Number of keys on your key ring? 3 or 4
38. How many years at your current job? See Question # 1
39. Favorite day of the week? Any day I can BUST A MOVE!
40. How many countries have you lived in? One
41. How many cities have you lived in/name them? er 4, Edmonton till I was 9 Kelowna till I was 22 then moved to Calgary for 7 months, then moved back to Kelowna, and then moved out to London Ontario when I turned 24
42. If you could change your name what would you change it to? Hannibal, or maybe just Rex....

It is Better to Have Loved and Lost, then to Have Paid For it and Not Liked It.

First a tune I dig....


Iggy Pop--Till Wrong Feels Right.


I took a poundin
From the Radio Today
I heard the radio say
Some peace of shit..
Was the Sound of Today

I took a beatin
When I saw my TV play it
I saw my TV play it
Over and Over
And there was no escape

The box is hollow
And that riff is fucken dead
That riff is fucken dead
But the riff is poundin
In my fucken head

Their gona push it
Until false is true
Until day is night
Their gona push it baby
Until Wrong feels Right

Until Wrong Feel Right

It's a bg industry
And they can beat my brain
With houses cars and shame
They are insane
Yeah
But they can beat my brain

God and his captains
They wana pull the fucken plug
They wana pull the fucken plug
And give the skies
Back to the Birds and Bugs

I was thinking about commercial radio and TV and figure that this song said it best.

Way to go again Iggy, you are a true genius.

I'm sick again.

Which is kinda funny, I got the Flu shot yesterday, but the Doc says I gots a harmless cold...Not the flu..So I guess I'm good.

Still feel just as shitty.

The last time I was ill THIS came out of me.....And I'm quite proud of it, although I'm having a huge writers block and its pissing me off. But I'm going to keep on tryin.

I got in touch with a cousin of mine I haven't spoken to in a long while and things are going well. I look forward to see her and her boys, as well as some other family members when I go back to B.C.

I am then looking forward to seeing family and friends out in Calgary. I may have said these things in a previous post so if I'm rambling it's the sick doing it's thing.

Not much else to tell, so I'll leave you with some more lyrics.

Primus--De'Anza Jig

Oh I can still remember
Jenny Hernando
She was my little lovely one when I was 17
I remember the day when she
Gave me her virginity
And then she gave it to everyone
In our vicinity

Oh I can still remember
Julie Tolentino
The dancin Filipino
We used to run around
Her and Flouncing Freddy
Were going hot and steady
Now she runs a dyke bar
The biggest one in town

Oh I can can still remember
My old friend Todd Squelate
I watched him snort a
Milkshake right up his nose
He'd snort it up the left side
And blow it out the right side
How it ever kept down
I will Never know

Oh I can still remember
Ol' Flouncin Freddy
We were pumpin gas
Down at El Sobrante Shell
His Mustang was his pride and joy
He liked to dance the cowboy
Hanging around at Jack in the Box
But eat at Taco Bell.

YEEEEEEEEEEEHAAAAAAAAAAWWW!!!!!

This is not a Pentagram, I'm just 5/6 Jewish.

Greetings one and all!

Looks like the Hellidaze are upon us. I for once am looking forward to it, as I get to go back and see my family and friends after a long years time.

I'm going to a Christmas party on Saturday, and for that I am going to attempt to make a gingerbread coffin. Again I've never made anything gingerbread, so we shall see how it goes. I may even have pics.

My cat Stimpy is still missing, That is going to kill me when I get home, and I'm not afraid to say that a few garments are going to be soaked salty. Yes, I'm that much of a man...

Something else has put a nip in my rickers.

About a couple of months back I sent a friend of mine a wedding gift. I didn't have much, but I sent what I could to him, cause he and I have been friends for a good 13 years and I figure that means something.

So I send it.

I figure it takes a while to get across the country so I waited for a bit, until recently when I realized I haven't heard from my friend in like 2 months since the gift was sent. I had seen him online a few times briefly since then but nothing for long.

So...

The other day I saw him online and he had been online the whole day. So after a while I sent him a message. Yes, I had to send HIM one...

I say "BITCH! You get my package?!"

This is all in good humour you understand......Mostly........

After a while he replies, "Yeah I did thx" and then "sorry, I've been busy"

huh

That is all I have heard from him since, and I only have one thing to say.

Dude, You, are a dick.

Sorry lol I love you man, but you're a dick. I had no idea the gift even got to him, It certainly didn't come back to me. C'mon it takes 2 minutes to knock off an e-mail saying you got the gift, and thank you.....WTF...Too busy my corpse painted ass :P

Enough Abuse!

Training at the station is going great! Although some of their equipotent is being repaired and I don't know if I'll get more training in till the new year because of it.
I ended up going up there yesterday only to find out I couldn't do any training, but I stayed and helped them out with labeling and what not, it is after all a volunteer powered radio station. Earned brownie points and got to know a few of the locals, not bad at all...


Anyhow, I'm fucken beat, so I'm off!