Work

It’s what you say you do to make that hard earned cash you so desperately need to survive. Not survival in the wilderness sense oh no! Survival from madness. Survival from reality. Survival is doing the best you can to constantly rebuild the delusion you made for yourself while the chisel of existence and the hammer of the universe breaks it down fucking day in and day out. The ego and self importance with a dash of narcissism, keep it going at any cost! Nothing gets you there faster than money and stuff. Keep it going until the day oblivion swallows you whole and history eventually forgets you existed.

Anyhow forget all that the important thing is that I get to the point.

Right! Steady on! Here we go!

I came to my particular place of compulsory slavery today, doing this and that for the other slaves of course. My cage is a mailroom you understand. Anything sacred or desirable comes through me first. Despite this I do not know the secrets of their corporate universe for I am employed as a mere conduit. One of my duties is to assist visitors in finding the knowledge and information they seek so they can go on their way unabated to serve their particular master and “get er done” as it were.
I was helping three women this morning.

Auditors.

Predatory birds of the business matrices. Instinct sharp and a head full of big fucking eyes. They cover their beak with lip stick their talons are meticulously looked after but the trained eye can see the truth. Their claws are soaked in echoer like ink ready to inscribe your mistakes in their clipboard tablets binding them forever in the archives of time! Their maws soaked in the blood of the innocent and unorganized. They do not feed on scraps like their passive avian cousins which we call “Accountants” no. You must be wary around the Auditor.

I was sharp and resolute when they came to me squawking commands of their business. I was doing well under their ever watchful gaze until one ask me a favour.

“Could you fire up the company website so I may instruct you on seeking out some information?”

My reply

“Certainly miss, I would be happy to get it up for you.”

I realized what I said right after I said it. I felt sweat on my brow and I felt my mouth trying desperately not to smile. This was it, they had me. It felt as though their eyes on me were stones grinding my organs to dust. I calmed myself and did the task they asked me to and listened. There was nothing. They were just waiting.
Waiting for what they asked for. The accidental innuendo was completely lost on them, and I felt relief.

Then I heard it, a solitary and silent giggle. It shocked me but it was beautiful. The others didn’t seem to notice. Something happened then that summoned their attention away from me and they were gone. It all happened so quickly. I was almost certainly food for such a comment but I was spared. Spared from Auditor tyranny! This gives me hope.

It gives me hope that an accident somehow sparked something in the most banal heart. A reminder that no matter what foul shape we’ve carved ourselves into over the years and no matter how much discipline we put into our craft, deep down we’re just perverts eager to breed, enjoy it, and laugh about it and this made me happy.

I feel the mixed sensation of embarrassment and amusement still from hours ago when it happened…….

Back to the grind.