When Life Gives You Lemons, You Clone Those Lemons, and Make Super Lemons.
Other than my advice on my last post I don't really know if I have anything interesting to report.
I know in my first entry I kind of eluded to the fact that some times I just don't know what the fuck is going on. I find myself in one of those times again.
Don't get me wrong, I know who I am and I generally know what I want to do in my life, but sometimes a plan derails , or it reveals a whole lot more obstacles than you thought it would. Normally I would just consider it another challenge but I find myself lost.
The Problem.
I was planning to go to school for radio broadcasting. They have a course here for that, but I just found out that it isn't as accessible as I thought it was. I have been trying to get into the program for the last 2 years but to no avail due to screw ups and other stuff. It means I have to wait a whole other year, and I thought this year would be the one. I would have my shit together(...As always) and get in. I did everything I screwed up doing last year. Then new info came to light.
I found out I was one of 450 applicants and there were only 40 spots available.
Bugger.
I first thought it was a first come first serve deal, but it wasn't. It helps to get it in soon but it also helps to have a good resume to show them that you are committed to a career in the field. I had no such luck with that.
So, a friend in a far away town suggested I investigate the schools there and consider a move. So I did, and found out it was even harder to get into the schools there. Its not worth a big move for that. So it appears I am stuck here.
So, my next objective is to make a resume by getting my ass out and giving a damn right?
Then why am I so apathetic about it right now? The drive seems to not be there. In fact a lot of drives seem to be right out of petrol.
I A. Sleep
B. Watch T.V.
C. Try to eat right and get out once in a blue moon.
D. Nothing Else
The most creative thing I have done is get my head into Storytelling Vampire The Requiem for a few chums of mine. Don't get me wrong, I love it! But I can't concentrate on only that. I would love to Finnish an RP world of my own and possibly run with that, but that's only one option, and since my enthusiasm for anything else is pretty stumped I'm not sure what to do.
Well, all I can do is ride it out I suppose and exercise my brain and body when I can until I get out of this. My fiance helps too, but as she is in another country , sometimes its tough. That's a whole other story.
I'm at a point right now where I'm only starting to know what I'm good at, and I'm only starting to know what I really want to roll with in life.
I'm turning twenty fucking seven in 5 days!
At least when I do watch T.V., or Read I find inspiration there and new ideas form, and that should count for something. As long as I don't let the bastards grind me down I should be fine. I will move into their midst.....Confident.......Composite and Finite.........And they won't be able to touch me, cause I'm the NIHILISTIC FUCKING ALCHEMIST BITCH!!!
You Better Axe Some Body...
P.S.
To those of you who have a big responsibility coming into their life, its time to start facing the truth. Some of it awful, some not. But face it you must.
Another Thing.
If someone loves you( I mean really loves you, not just a "Love you Bro" thing) don't take that shit for granted. Consider yourself lucky to even have some one in your life like that when some people don't have a pot to piss in. You got it easy compared to some. If you have someone like that it means something. It means that no matter what happens to you, that person will be there. They won't be there for themselves, they will be there for you. There are people who go their whole lives in search for this and don't find it. Do us a favour and appreciate it.
Make a choice and someone may suffer.
Make no choice at all and everyone will.
I know in my first entry I kind of eluded to the fact that some times I just don't know what the fuck is going on. I find myself in one of those times again.
Don't get me wrong, I know who I am and I generally know what I want to do in my life, but sometimes a plan derails , or it reveals a whole lot more obstacles than you thought it would. Normally I would just consider it another challenge but I find myself lost.
The Problem.
I was planning to go to school for radio broadcasting. They have a course here for that, but I just found out that it isn't as accessible as I thought it was. I have been trying to get into the program for the last 2 years but to no avail due to screw ups and other stuff. It means I have to wait a whole other year, and I thought this year would be the one. I would have my shit together(...As always) and get in. I did everything I screwed up doing last year. Then new info came to light.
I found out I was one of 450 applicants and there were only 40 spots available.
Bugger.
I first thought it was a first come first serve deal, but it wasn't. It helps to get it in soon but it also helps to have a good resume to show them that you are committed to a career in the field. I had no such luck with that.
So, a friend in a far away town suggested I investigate the schools there and consider a move. So I did, and found out it was even harder to get into the schools there. Its not worth a big move for that. So it appears I am stuck here.
So, my next objective is to make a resume by getting my ass out and giving a damn right?
Then why am I so apathetic about it right now? The drive seems to not be there. In fact a lot of drives seem to be right out of petrol.
I A. Sleep
B. Watch T.V.
C. Try to eat right and get out once in a blue moon.
D. Nothing Else
The most creative thing I have done is get my head into Storytelling Vampire The Requiem for a few chums of mine. Don't get me wrong, I love it! But I can't concentrate on only that. I would love to Finnish an RP world of my own and possibly run with that, but that's only one option, and since my enthusiasm for anything else is pretty stumped I'm not sure what to do.
Well, all I can do is ride it out I suppose and exercise my brain and body when I can until I get out of this. My fiance helps too, but as she is in another country , sometimes its tough. That's a whole other story.
I'm at a point right now where I'm only starting to know what I'm good at, and I'm only starting to know what I really want to roll with in life.
I'm turning twenty fucking seven in 5 days!
At least when I do watch T.V., or Read I find inspiration there and new ideas form, and that should count for something. As long as I don't let the bastards grind me down I should be fine. I will move into their midst.....Confident.......Composite and Finite.........And they won't be able to touch me, cause I'm the NIHILISTIC FUCKING ALCHEMIST BITCH!!!
You Better Axe Some Body...
P.S.
To those of you who have a big responsibility coming into their life, its time to start facing the truth. Some of it awful, some not. But face it you must.
Another Thing.
If someone loves you( I mean really loves you, not just a "Love you Bro" thing) don't take that shit for granted. Consider yourself lucky to even have some one in your life like that when some people don't have a pot to piss in. You got it easy compared to some. If you have someone like that it means something. It means that no matter what happens to you, that person will be there. They won't be there for themselves, they will be there for you. There are people who go their whole lives in search for this and don't find it. Do us a favour and appreciate it.
Make a choice and someone may suffer.
Make no choice at all and everyone will.
posted by Fictional Correspondant at 4:50 AM
2 Comments:
If I had a hundred watt transmitter I'd turn that shit over to you, edumacation or not.
Yeah, getting into that higher learning nonsense is a pain in the arse sometimes. Keep slogging at it, since short of sucking the dean's cock (or someone else with influence), it's the bureaucracy you've got to deal with, and it tends to be a Soviet nightmare at its worst. :P
United Statesian t-shirts: the right to bare arms.
I am also going to submitt some advice; don't wait for the system(ie;school) to provide you with the opportunities. The system produces apathy, it will create every reason why "not" to do something. Think of how many people whom are submitting themselves to this radio program and walking out to do something totally unrelated to radio brodcasting. Try not to follow thier path, you want to be a radio brodcaster, do it. School should be seen as one tool, but it doesn't nessasaraly mean it's the main tool. My cousin went to school to be a writer, but didn't finish. Instead her own professors told her that school teachs her about writing but not how to do the task. She decided to quit shool and start writing, now she is on a short list for a major writers contest with a 10000 prize and has been published in several poetry magazines.
The point is that school doesn't make a writer, I am also willing to bet school doesn't automaticly make a radio broadcaster. Try and think outside the box.....
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